brave new woman

last night i was leaving work and i heard a dog barking very loudly, and it sounded very close. so, instantly, i feel each muscle of my body tense up and i'm scared, even though on principle i enjoy animals and the companionship they offer. just as i'm looking around, waiting to be attacked and eaten by a icelandic pony-sized doberman, i see my attacker: a wee little dog in a sweater for god's sakes barking at me from a nearby parking space, the little pom-poms on his sweater shaking with each bark (and for the record, the barking sounded much deeper than a tiny dog would warrant uh or i'm a total wimp). i laughed and took a step in mr. sweater's direction and to my horror, he started to run away and into the street. well i convinced him not to run into the street and i tried to tempt him over with some cheddar pretzel combos that my thoughtful friend adrianne bought for me this weekend, but to no avail. mr. sweater just wanted to bark and threaten to run into the street and not listen to my voice of reason. our standoff lasted roughly 10 minutes before i just flagged down a cop and let him try to get mr. sweater home. moral of the story? police can be your friend and help you rein in intolerable little beasts that, despite being barky and incorrigible, really don't deserve to be flattened by dutch traffic.

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